Do you ever feel like you will never be good enough at something so you don’t even start trying?
What on earth is ‘good enough’ anyway. Who are you letting being the judge of that – other people or perhaps even yourself? Who are these other people and why do we take so much notice of them and give them so much power in our minds?
Why do you keep comparing your ability to them? How is that helping you even get started on whatever it is you have been avoiding? Where is that avoidance coming from. Have you explored that it just might link back to an experience in the past when you were told you just weren’t as good as the next person.
I spoke with a mother some time ago now but the story is still with me. She was telling me how her 7 year old ‘tried out’ to learn violin at school and she was told she wouldn’t be able to have lessons because she didn’t have a good enough ear!!! What? She is 7 years old. How devastating for her. At this tender age, she has probably already made the very damaging decision that she’s just not musical.
I have spoken to so many adults over the years who have made this decision and I have had to use many examples to prove to them once again that they are born musical. You actually don’t get to choose whether you are musical or not. It is imprinted on your DNA! When you walk, you walk with a very rhythmic Left Right pattern. You naturally walk evenly. I challenge you to try and walk around today unevenly. I can guarantee you will have to think hard to make yourself walk un-rhythmically or ‘unmusically’.
Your heart beats rhythmically for goodness sake! When you go to a concert you are able to clap in time with the entire audience. It doesn’t matter if there are 10, 1,000 or 10,000 people there everyone ends up clapping in time.
Our speech is improvisational in nature. We are ‘composing’ our conversations with each other all day every day. We don’t need to walk around with a set of notes to tell us what to say next to our friends or colleagues. We just string words together, these words become sentences and all of a sudden, we have quite an extensive conversation that is completely made up on the spot.
This is a musical skill!
However, I still have people tell me that they haven’t got a musical bone in their body. I firmly believe this can be traced back to a previous experience where they have been ‘advised’ by someone who thought they knew it all that they will never be good at music. Perhaps they were told to lip sing in the school choir, maybe they were told they were a ‘thumper’ on the piano, perhaps jokes were made about them playing the triangle or something else as trite.
We MUST stop judging each other and start raising people up. There can be no room for this type of stereotyping any more. How dare someone in so called authority have this devastating impact on so many. There are far too many jokes in our western culture about people who can’t sing. I’m over it. Let’s band together and support each other so we can develop a sense of FREEDOM for people to express themselves through whatever musical pursuit they choose, without making them feel ‘less than’ for being brave enough to bare their musical soul.
If you would like to find out how we can help you rediscover who you are musically just email firstname.lastname@example.org with your best contact number and I’ll be in touch to discuss some possibilities for you.